At one time or another, we were asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I don't remember what my answer was; it might have been a teacher or a firefighter. I asked our sons the very same question, their responses were very different. I hope I don’t sound too condescending, our sons have been doing very well in school, that both of them are in the accelerated programs.
So, what were their responses? "I want to be an inventor, an engineer or a pediatrician." said our ten year old. My wife and I both nodded in great delight. How about our younger son? Our eight year old revealed that he wanted to be a video game programmer. I nodded at his idea, but it drew a concerned look from his mom. I knew he really wanted to be a full time video gamer, but I'm willing to take the "game programmer" personal goal. “As long as you work hard at it and become a great game programmer.”, I said to him. My wife’s eyes widened even more.
They still have a long way to go before they find out what really drives them, where their passions are, and what career paths they will ultimately choose. As much as we are on the same page, most of the time anyway; my wife and I part views when it comes to education. While she firmly believes that academic achievements pave way to a successful career, which I don't dispute; however, I would disagree that academics ARE the only contributing factors to a bright future.
A month or two ago, we recognized “Jen” as one of the featured star students in a local publication. Both our families belong to the same Taiwanese association. She is currently a high school senior. Jen and several of her friends work at the community animal shelters, humane societies in their spare time. They are also strong supporters for a greener earth. Jen's career goal is to become a veterinarian. We thought it was an excellent career goal and we believed she was poised to achieving it.
A few nights after we read the article, Jen's dad, "Dave" emailed me about an upcoming association event. I replied to his inquiries and congratulated him on his daughter making the papers, and her goal of becoming a vet. The next evening I received a reply from Dave regarding the event. At the end of the message, Dave said there was nothing to congratulate him about; that what Jen had done was more or less "her hobby", in his words. It stumped me for a minute, I didn't know how to reply, or should even reply. I mentioned Dave’s response to my wife, she too, was at a loss for words.
We both thought that Jen had set an excellent career goal. What's wrong with wanting to become a veterinarian? Although we were both surprised by Dave’ response, it didn’t come as a shock. Having known Dave for almost 4 years now, we have also learned that he himself is a very high achiever. Dave holds a PhD in Applied Physics and works as a Sr. systems engineer for a large corporation. In the few events that we had worked together, he often ended up working by himself, maybe with some assistance from his wife.
I don’t know what would make a good career choice in Dave’s eye. He wasn’t thrilled about his oldest daughter marching into the business world. It doesn’t look like he would be too supportive in his younger daughter’s choice of career path either. I didn’t send a reply to Dave, but I couldn’t help but wondered. As parents, shouldn’t we allow our children to dream their own dreams? If they contribute to our society, shouldn’t we see to it that they get the opportunity to fulfill their potentials under their own terms?
